Anandangan: A Love Beyond Boundaries 

February 2025

 

Niru and Dhruv worked in the same office, navigating the endless demands of their careers and family lives. They were both responsible, devoted, and deeply embedded in their worlds yet somewhere within, they carried an unspoken longing. Not for something forbidden, but for a space where they could simply breathe. 

At home, Niru juggled not just work and household responsibilities but also the relentless demands of caring for her ailing father-in-law, whose fading memory was taking a toll on all of them. The weight of his illness pressed heavily on her, stretching her patience and strength thin. Dhruv, on the other hand, grappled with the growing distance in his marriage. His wife immersed herself in social gatherings with her friends, leaving little room for their shared moments. Yet, she never failed to pressure him for a bigger apartment in a better part of the city – an expense he simply couldn’t afford. No matter how often he tried to reason with her, she refused to accept it, her expectations widening the rift between them. 

One afternoon, weary from meetings and deadline expectations, they stepped out for a walk. Wandering through a quiet alley behind their office, they stumbled upon a hidden courtyard framed by an arched doorway. The golden autumn leaves rustled softly, the tiled floor shimmered under the filtered sunlight, and the scent of earth and flowers filled the air. 

“This place feels like peace,” Niru whispered, running her fingers along the mosaic tiles. 

Dhruv nodded, exhaling deeply, “Like it was waiting for us.” 

From that day on, Anandangan “the courtyard of joy”, as Niru named it became their quiet refuge. They never planned their meetings, yet whenever the weight of life grew unbearable, they would find themselves drawn there, standing side by side, speaking in murmurs or in silence. 

They talked about books, about childhood dreams that had faded, about happiness and its fleeting nature. Their connection never felt like a betrayal, only an understanding one that did not disrupt the homes they had built but added something unspoken to their lives. A stillness. A pause. 

But then, there was that week. 

Dhruv had arrived one evening, his usual calm replaced with a restlessness she had never seen before. He paced, barely speaking. When he finally did, his words were sharp, distant. “Why did you text me?” 

Sometimes, we forget that not all spaces are ours to claim. 

And then, for seven days, he did not come, for Niru at Anandangan. 

Niru waited. At first, she told herself it was a mere coincidence. Then, she worried. By the fifth day, she understood. There were boundaries, invisible yet crucial, that neither of them could afford to cross. 

When Dhruv finally returned, she did not ask where he had been. He did not offer an explanation. Instead, they sat on the stone bench in silence, listening to the rustling leaves, as if nothing had happened. 

But something had. 

The air between them was thick with unspoken words, the weight of an invisible shift pressing down on them. The leaves whispered secrets they wouldn’t voice, and the distance that had long settled between them now felt like an unbridgeable chasm. Yet, in that shared silence, there was also an unacknowledged understanding—something had changed, and neither knew if it could ever be undone. 

From that day forward, Niru never let herself forget ”Anandangan” was not a place to claim, only a place to visit. Their connection was not something to hold onto, only something to cherish. 

Years passed, and life carried them in different directions; transfers, responsibilities, the natural drift of time. 

One autumn afternoon, much later, Niru found herself standing alone under the familiar archway. The wind carried a whisper of a memory, a presence she could almost feel. 

She smiled. Some loves do not need names, nor promises.  

Some just need a place. 

And Anandangan had been theirs. 

 

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Beyond The White

January 2025

 

After her husband’s death, Meera Roy moved to her paternal village, seeking the quiet solace of a simpler life. She exchanged the hustle bustle of the city and the prestige of her academic career for tuition classes sitting on a wooden chair left by her grandfather, with children on the floor on some coloured rugs (satranjis) that she brought from her city.
Her days were filled with teaching children who clung to her words like lifelines, and her evenings with solitude, steeped in books and memories.
Meera’s journey into village life was not confined to rediscovering herself. As she settled into her paternal home, a rundown structure needing significant repair, she decided to rebuild it slowly and steadily, waiting to meet the right people in the village who could help her. While the house drew curious stares, it was her decision to start tuition classes in basic English and math for the village children that truly caught everyone’s attention.
Once the word spread, Meera’s daytime hours became busy with eager young learners. Teaching brought her immense joy, filling her days with purpose and connection. Wide-eyed and enthusiastic children became her companions in a life that now felt fuller than ever. Though the villagers whispered about the childless widow who had moved into their midst for good, she remained unperturbed, centred with her intention, to settle in this village. She had found her calling, and in the vibrant, innocent energy of these village children, she saw a reflection of the hope she was beginning to nurture within herself.
Meera had embraced widowhood with a quiet dignity, wearing only plain white saris, her once jet-black hair now streaked with grey. She had convinced herself that love, color, and joy were things of the past.
Then came Raghav.
He was a poor farmer, young and rugged, with sunburned skin and hands calloused from tilling the soil. He brought his daughter Piya to the new teacher’s home every morning, waiting at the gate patiently until she disappeared inside. At first, it was just polite exchanges of thank-yous for allowing Piya to attend her tuition class despite his inability to pay and inquiries about how she was doing in class. But as the days turned into weeks, their conversations grew longer, more personal.
Raghav was nothing like the intellectuals Meera had once known. He spoke in broken phrases but with an honesty that disarmed her. He talked of droughts and crops, his love for Piya, and his struggles as a single parent – Manju, his wife, had been bedridden for years.
Sometimes, he brought her fresh vegetables from his farm – eggplants, tomatoes, or bundles of leafy greens, their earthy scent filling Meera’s small kitchen. He would leave them at her door, an unspoken gesture that needed no words. It was his way of saying he cared.
In his quiet strength and these small acts of kindness, Meera found herself drawn to something she couldn’t name. His earnestness, his resilience, and the way he looked at her – as though she wasn’t just a widow in white, but a woman with a mind and heart – made her feel alive again.
One evening, Raghav stood at her door, a small package in his hands. “This is for you,” he said, thrusting it forward, his face flushed.
Meera opened it to find a sari – a simple but vibrant shade of maroon. She stared at it, confused. “I don’t wear colors anymore,” she said, her voice barely above a whisper.
“That’s why I bought it,” Raghav said, his tone firm but his eyes gentle. “Meera ji, you’ve given so much to this village, to Piya, to me.” Raghav’s tone was firm but his eyes gentle. His earnest look said “Please wear this for me.” But, he was not articulate enough to put it into words.
Her hands trembled as she held the sari. She didn’t know what shocked her more – the gift, his words, or the way he spoke her name, as if daring her to see herself anew.
Later that night, she sat before her mirror, holding the maroon cotton fabric against her face. She traced the streaks of grey in her hair, lines of time etched into her skin, and wondered: What was this strange attraction to Raghav? Was it the vitality he exuded, the simple honesty of his love for life? Or was she, despite her intellect and composure, searching for something she couldn’t name – companionship, perhaps, or the feeling of being seen again?
When the annual village mela arrived, Meera decided, almost impulsively, to wear the maroon sari. As she draped the soft fabric around her, she caught her reflection in the mirror. The vibrant color transformed her, as though the woman staring back had shed years of solitude. A small smile tugged at her lips, hesitant but undeniable.
The village children gathered at her door, ready to head to the fair, their excitement infectious. Piya, clutching Meera’s hand, suddenly noticed her change. “Meera Didi!” Piya exclaimed, clapping her hands with delight. “You look so pretty! Just like the flowers at the temple!” Her words were full of unfiltered joy, her laughter a melody that made Meera’s heart swell.
As they walked towards the mela grounds, Raghav appeared at the gate, waiting as always. The moment he saw her, he froze. His rugged features softened, his dark eyes widening with a mix of surprise and admiration. His lips parted slightly, but no words came. It was his expression that spoke volumes – a silent gasp, a spark of wonder. He looked at Meera as though she had just stepped out of a dream, a vision he couldn’t quite believe.
The corners of his mouth lifted into the faintest of smiles, the kind that lit up his entire face. Meera felt a warmth creep up her cheeks under his gaze. It wasn’t the first time Raghav had looked at her, but this was different – deeper, tender, as though the maroon sari had revealed not just a new Meera but a piece of her she had long buried.
Piya tugged at his hand and giggled. “Baba, isn’t Meera Didi beautiful?” she chirped.
Raghav blinked and finally found his voice, though it was low and thick with emotion. “She is” he said simply, the words holding a gravity that made Meera’s breath catch.
They walked to the mela together, the night around them alive with colors, music, and laughter. But for Meera, the world seemed quieter, as if the vibrant hues and chatter had faded into the background, leaving only Raghav’s gaze lingering on her like a whispered promise.
Just before they went on a ride on the giant wheel, at a stall adorned with glittering bangles, Raghav paused. He picked up a set of glass bangles, their maroon hue matching her sari perfectly. He held them out to her, his hands trembling slightly. “These…” he began, his voice barely above a murmur, “they belong to you.”
For a moment, Meera stood still, the noise of the mela dissolving around her. Slowly, she extended her hand, allowing him to slip the bangles onto her wrist. His fingers brushed against her skin, sending a shiver up her arm. The clinking of the glass echoed softly, a sound as delicate as the moment itself.
“Thank you,” she said, her voice just as quiet, but her emotions loud and raw beneath the surface.
When they finally boarded the giant wheel, Meera found herself sitting across from Raghav, with Piya giggling next to her. As the wheel ascended, her stomach churned – not just from the height but from the intensity of the moment. The breeze brushed her face, but it was Raghav’s steady gaze that left her breathless. His eyes held a quiet admiration, and for a fleeting second, she felt as though the world below had disappeared, leaving only the two of them suspended in time.
The ride, though brief, was transformative. As the wheel descended, Meera’s heartbeat steadied, but her feelings remained a whirl of uncertainty and exhilaration. She glanced at Raghav, who offered her a small, reassuring smile, and in that moment, she felt the faintest stirrings of courage – a courage she hadn’t realized she possessed.
As they made their way back home, the maroon sari swayed with her steps, and the bangles glittered under the moonlight. Raghav walked beside her, his presence steady and warm. For the first time in years, Meera didn’t feel like a shadow of her past. She felt alive, seen, and cherished.
It wasn’t just the sari or the bangles. It was the way Raghav looked at her – as if she wasn’t just a widow reclaiming colors, but a woman reclaiming her place in a man’s heart. And in that quiet walk, Meera realized she had taken the first step toward embracing the possibility of love, not as an end, but as a beginning.

 

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The Answer

December 2024

I was recovering from a painful miscarriage, a time when questions swirled within me like an unrelenting storm. Seeking solace, we decided to spend some time in Puri, hoping the sea’s timeless rhythm would bring comfort and quiet to my troubled heart.
One serene evening, as twilight wrapped the shore in its gentle embrace, I stood at the edge of the Bay of Bengal. The waves unfurled their ancient melodies, caressing the golden sands that stretched endlessly before me. The air was thick with the scent of salt and an inexplicable sense of healing.
In the distance, the silhouette of the Jagannath Temple stood tall, its spire reaching toward the heavens, like a guardian watching over the land and sea. Against the backdrop of the dusk-tinged sky, it was a reminder of enduring faith and resilience – a sight that brought a flicker of peace to my weary soul.
The beach in front of our hotel was a tranquil haven, its quiet charm a welcome retreat. Mornings painted a different picture, vibrant and full of energy, while evenings embraced a soothing calm that seemed to echo my need for solitude.
Drawn to the serenity of dusk, I would slip away from the crowds and find my spot on the beach. The cool sand cradled me as I sat, a silent witness to the ocean’s mesmerizing dance. The waves rolled in, their rhythm timeless, while the salty breeze carried whispers of faraway lands and forgotten dreams. That evening My eyes wandered to a couple standing by the water’s edge.
My gaze kept drifting towards them. They were perhaps in their mid-twenties. They stood close, their silhouettes etched against the glowing horizon. Something about their presence felt poetic, as if they too were searching for answers in the sea’s endless expanse.
There was something different, almost unspoken, in the way they communicated with each other. The more I chose not to stare, the more I was drawn to look at them, as though the mystery between them had cast an invisible thread, pulling my attention toward them.
What was it that unsettled me? Why was I feeling curious and disturbed? At first, I thought they were simply captivated by the beauty of the moment, choosing silence as a tribute to the sea’s grandeur. But as I observed them, I realized their silence was not a choice; it was a way of their life. They had never learned to speak with words.
And yet, they spoke – through glances, gestures, and the unbroken rhythm of understanding that flowed between them like a secret language only the sea could translate. Their connection, seemed deep and profound, stirred something within me. It was beautiful, yet haunting, as though their silence mirrored an unspoken yearning within myself.
Their quiet communication was anything but empty. The man’s hands moved with vibrant energy, tracing unseen shapes in the air. The woman’s followed, her eyes sparkling with understanding. Her fingers replied with fluid grace, each motion carrying a meaning, that words could never fully capture. Their exchange was a symphony of expressions, gestures, and trust.
As the evening deepened, the waves grew livelier, splashing closer to their feet. The man pointed to the horizon where the last rays of sunlight glimmered on the water, and his partner responded with a soundless laugh, her joy radiating like the glow of the setting sun. Together, they stood against the wind and the waves, as if anchored by a force stronger than the sea itself.
Watching them, I felt a deep sense of humility. Words often fail us, tangled in misinterpretations and ego, but here were two souls who needed none of them. Their bond was pure, unadulterated by the clutter of spoken language. They trusted their shared silence, their faith in each other unwavering.
As the sun dipped below the horizon, leaving the sky awash with fiery hues, the couple turned and walked along the shoreline. Their shadows, long and intertwined, stretched over the sand like a promise.
And in that moment, I understood something profound: the deepest connections don’t always need words. Like the waves that kiss the shore without ever staying, their silent language was a testament to courage, faith, and love in its truest form.
The sea continued its eternal ebb and flow, carrying their unspoken truths into the vastness, steady and unyielding, like life itself.
As I walked back to my hotel room that evening, something profound shifted within me. For the first time, I found my answer to the relentless “Why me? Why me?” that had haunted my soul. The sea, my steadfast confidant, had given me yet another revelation. Tonight, it whispered a question back: What if the soul that left you was born this way?
The thought lingered, weaving its way into my heart. What if the life I mourned was destined for a silent existence – a life without words, yet rich with the unspoken? Watching the pair at the shore, I realized their bond was not lesser; it was perhaps deeper, more sacred. It wasn’t about what was missing but about what was present – connection, trust, and love that transcended language.
The next morning, I woke with an unfamiliar lightness. To my husband’s great surprise, I announced, “I’m going to sunbathe on the beach and enjoy the morning tumult.” His expression shifted from shock to a quiet joy, for he knew in that moment my healing was complete. The sea, in its infinite wisdom, had helped me let go.
As the day unfolded, the sunlit waves mirrored my newfound clarity. The cacophony of life felt harmonious, the chaos purposeful. I embraced the vibrant energy of the beach, the chatter of children, and the laughter of strangers, feeling at peace with both the noise and the silence within.
Secretly, I returned to the shore, hoping to catch a glimpse of the couple again who had unknowingly guided me toward this revelation. A few hours later I saw them again; standing by the waves.
The man pointed at two seagulls, and his partner responded with a soundless laugh that lit up the morning. Their silent world was not broken; it was whole in a way I had never understood. My eyes wandered to the shoreline, where a pair of seagulls stood together on the sand. One bird tilted its head, its beak open as though calling out to the other, while its companion stood silent yet attentive. Their stance, so close and unyielding against the gentle lapping of the waves.
The sea continued its eternal rhythm, carrying their silent truths into the vastness, just as it had carried my grief and questions.
I walked back that noon with a heart unburdened and a mind at peace, knowing that life, like the sea, ebbs and flows, but it always brings answers if we are willing to listen.
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40 Years Later
November 2024
The University of Toronto’s St. George Campus stood timeless, its ivy-draped walls and Gothic spires whispering stories of years gone by. Among these enduring echoes of history, Angelo and Jim found themselves back where it all began – forty years after life had first entwined their fates.
As students, Jim and Angelo were inseparable, two high school buddies who made it to university together, their days consumed by soccer and late-night study sessions. Romance had seemed an elusive dream, secondary to the relentless rhythm of their youthful ambitions. But one afternoon, the Victoria College Quad – quiet and serene – wove a thread of destiny into Angelo’s life.
Walking through the peaceful courtyard, his cleats slung casually over his shoulder, Angelo noticed a girl crouched by a bench, her face a blend of worry and focus. Drawn by an innate chivalry, he approached her.
“Can I help?” he offered, his voice steady and warm.
The girl looked up, her eyes the color of a summer sky. “I lost an earring. It’s very dear to me – my grandmother gave it to me when I got into university.”
With a determination fueled by something he couldn’t quite name, Angelo crouched beside her, carefully moving the wooden bench.
Between the ivy-covered walls and the worn stone floor, he spotted the delicate glint of gold.
“Found it,” he said, handing her the treasure as though it were the world’s most precious gem.
Relief and gratitude lit her face. “Thank you so much! I owe you a coffee. When can we meet?”
“Now,” Angelo replied impulsively, captivated by her luminous smile.
“I wish I could,” she said with a soft laugh, “but I have class. What about 5 p.m.? Right here?”
“Perfect,” Angelo agreed, forgetting entirely about his soccer practice that evening.
As he walked away, he knew he’d have to explain to Jim why he’d missed their match. But for now, his thoughts lingered on Kathy – the girl with the ocean-blue eyes who had unknowingly stolen his heart.
The weeks that followed were a blur of coffee dates and stolen moments. Angelo found himself skipping practices, his passion for soccer eclipsed by his growing affection for Kathy. The depth of her laughter, the way her eyes danced as she spoke – he was falling, and he didn’t want to stop.
But guilt tugged at him for leaving Jim out of his newfound joy. One evening, Angelo broached the subject with Kathy. “Jim’s my best friend, and I hate seeing him alone. Do you think we could introduce him to someone?”
Kathy’s face lit up. “Actually, I have the perfect friend for him!”
The introduction was set, but fate had its own plans. When Angelo finally shared the idea with Jim, his friend smiled knowingly.
“Funny you should mention that” Jim said. “I’ve already found someone. She’s incredible – loves soccer, just like us.”
Years passed like pages in a book, each chapter bringing its own joys and challenges.
Angelo and Kathy’s love story grew stronger with time, and they often reminisced about that fateful day in the quad. On their 40th anniversary, they decided to return to the campus that had brought them together.
A couple of days before their visit to the university campus, Angelo sent a message to Jim, who now lived in another province. To his surprise, Jim replied with excitement: “I’ll be in town that day! Let’s meet and bring Kathy. My wife, Jenn, will join us too!”
At noon, as they strolled hand in hand through familiar paths, Angelo and Kathy approached the bench in the quad, where two figures stood waiting. Time had added lines to their faces but couldn’t dim the light in Jim’s eyes. Beside him was Jenn – the very friend Kathy had once suggested introducing to Jim.
Laughter and stories filled the air as the four of them walked through the campus, the years folding away like a map. In that moment, amidst the echoes of old architecture and the memories they carried, love felt timeless – a connection that, like the university itself, stood unwavering against the tides of time.
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Twilight At The Estate 

October 2024

 

In the heart of British colonial India, amidst the grandeur of a sprawling estate, lived a woman named Kavita who served Lady Evelyn with unwavering devotion. Kavita’s days were filled with tending to Lady Evelyn’s needs, from meticulously arranging her wardrobe and assisting with her elaborate attire, to preparing her favorite herbal infusions that reminded the Lady of the English countryside. Kavita managed the household with quiet efficiency, overseeing the staff and ensuring that the estate ran smoothly. Beyond her duties, she was Lady Evelyn’s trusted confidante, offering her comfort during times of homesickness and loneliness. Their bond, though shaped by the dynamics of colonial hierarchy, transcended servant and mistress; Kavita became an irreplaceable figure in Lady Evelyn’s world, bridging two vastly different cultures with grace and compassion.  

In the unique connection that blossomed between Kavita and Lady Evelyn, they shared whispered conversations by the garden, laughing at each other’s jokes and confiding in one another. Kavita’s genuine care and compassion touched Lady Evelyn’s heart, transcending the boundaries of class and station.   

One evening, under the soft glow of the moon, Kavita revealed her deepest secret to Lady Evelyn – she had fallen in love with none other than Lady Evelyn’s own brother, Alexander. Kavita’s voice trembled as she spoke of the forbidden affection that had grown between them, an emotion she had fought but could not suppress.   

To Lady Evelyn’s own surprise, her response was one of understanding and support. She had observed the tenderness between Kavita and Alexander and recognized the purity of their connection. Instead of reprimanding Kavita, Lady Evelyn offered her blessing, acknowledging that love knew no boundaries.  

With Lady Evelyn’s encouragement, Kavita and Alexander’s love story began to unfold discreetly. Their stolen moments became precious gems, tucked away from the prying eyes of the estate’s society. Lady Evelyn ensured they had time to nurture their relationship, even if it meant bending the rules of convention. She loved to see her brother happy.  

As the years went by, Kavita’s loyalty to Lady Evelyn never wavered. She continued to serve with grace and devotion, and her love for Alexander deepened. Lady Evelyn’s open-mindedness and acceptance of their relationship became a beacon of hope, influencing others to question the rigid norms of their time.   

When the winds of change finally swept through the country, bringing an end to British rule, Kavita, Lady Evelyn, and Alexander found themselves on a new path. Like a storm, everything changed , flipping their lives and scattering their certainties.  

Alexander was soon called back to England, bound by his family’s tradition of marrying someone of his own class to preserve the family’s legacy. As he departed, Alexander promised he would find a way to make things right, leaving Kavita clinging to a fragile hope. Kavita was heartbroken, but she knew her love for Alexander could never defy the rigid customs of the time. She watched in silence as Alexander left, carrying with him her heart and the dreams of a life together.  

Months turned into years, and life on the estate carried on, though Kavita’s heart bore an unspoken ache. Exactly two years and seven months later, Alexander returned, his presence like a gust of wind that stirred both joy and dread in her heart. She stood by the window as he approached, her pulse quickening with a blend of anticipation and uneasy apprehension. 

When their eyes met, the tenderness of their shared past lingered, but there was a distance in his gaze. Alexander had come to say goodbye, for his path now lay elsewhere, dictated by obligations he could not ignore. His voice trembled as he explained the finality of his decision, and though Kavita’s strength wavered, she met his words with a quiet dignity. 

Lady Evelyn, watching the scene unfold from her quarters, felt an ache she hadn’t known before. For all her open-mindedness and bold defiance of convention, she could not rewrite the rules that had governed their lives. 

As the sun dipped below the horizon, Alexander stepped into the Rolls-Royce, leaving Kavita standing on the upper balcony, framed by the estate’s graceful arches. Lady Evelyn glanced back one last time, their eyes meeting briefly. The fading twilight cast a quiet melancholy over the mansion, as if it too mourned the love and loyalty now left behind. 

Kavita whispered a goodbye softly into the fading dusk.